I had a wardrobe malfunction today. Not as in Janet Jackson's famous incident (which, don't google if you're not familiar with the story... this is a family blog people) but equally mortifying.
People here get dressed up for church. As I was getting ready for church this morning I realized I don't really have many dresses. I have lots of skirts and lots of t-shirts that I wear with them, but not a whole lot of dressy, "church" clothes.
So this morning, I got dressed (of course I had Nahomi iron all our outfits. She SWEARS she loves to iron, so hey, no sweat, know what I mean? The lady likes to iron-- pa gen pwoblem as far as I am concerned.) So I dressed in a dress shirt with a CUTE pair of capri's underneath. They were denim, but a bit fancyish, and around these parts, jeans can be REALLY dressy.
What I failed to realize is that NO women, I mean NO women (as in not one single one) wear pants or shorts to church. (or capris) I hadn't really thought about it too much because when we lived in Port au Prince, lots of women wore pants/capris, whatever to church. Yeah, not here. Not at all. Like zero. So I arrive at church all dolled up (I had even plucked my eyebrows AND applied mascara today-- so you know, ALL dolled up. ) I'm looking all cute. I get into church and start singing (well, lipsynching, cause I don't really know the songs.) And I start looking around and I realize EVERY SINGLE WOMAN in the room is wearing a dress or skirt. Little kids, big kids, teenagers, adults, babies, old ladies. Every one of them. Except, well, me.
It felt very uncomfortable. So I did what any self-confident woman in this situation would do... I slinked out the back and spent the rest of the morning upstairs in the children's church area where I could at least spread my rebellious dressing message to a younger, more "moldable" (ie; brainwashable) generation.
3 comments:
so... you need your mom to go shopping?? what size??
immediately following your departure, Pastor's message was changed to "propriety of dress for Women who aren't blasphemers in a God-fearing society" followed by a parade of the properly dressed females remaining in the congregation (all of them). There was then a brief PowerPoint presentation including snap shots of your "wardrobe" while attendin services in Port, and a map of the area of Jacmel to avoid at all cost (your house).
I'm so ashamed. :-(
I had a clever little quip all prepared, but then I read Dave's comment and realized that anything I could say would pale in comparison. I might have tinkled in my pants a little... which, 10 days postpartum, really isn't the end of the world.
You're such a sinner.
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