Last night I had a really, really disturbing dream. It was too horrific to describe, but it was one of those dreams that leave you feeling kind of "spooked" throughout the next day. Ever had that feeling?
The point of me sharing this is that I was struck this morning by a component of the dream which now is getting me thinking. The "bad guy" in the dream was the crazy bad guy character in Silence of the Lambs. (Not Hannibal Lector, James Gum, the guy who was killing women to make a suit out of skin-- blech.)
I can't stop thinking about that this morning because seriously I have not seen that movie in YEARS. Yet, it is still (obviously) deeply ingrained in my memory. I have probably seen that movie twice in my life-- it's not something that I watched over and over and over. (like I did with My Cousin Vinny-- I could recite that WHOLE movie.)
So what's the point? Well, I am not sure yet. But it has gotten me thinking about the things I put into my mind especially when it comes to "entertainment." Now this is probably going to sound REALLY harsh and legalistic, but humor me for a second. If I watch most of what is on TV or in the movies I am LITERALLY entertaining myself with images and tales of sin... the very kinds of sin that Jesus went to the cross for.
Now, I have logically argued that as an adult and someone who has "wisdom" and "good judgment" that I can watch these things and they will not tempt me to sin in these ways. That's true in a way... I have never desired to kill a bunch of girls and make clothes out of their skin. However, last night I was dreaming about this very character. He was a character who was doing horrific things to me and people I loved in my dreams.
I might have some sort of "control" over my conscious thoughts and actions. But what about my unconscious thoughts and actions? What about the dreams and random thoughts that just seem to POP into my mind with a will of their own? What kinds of things am I feeding my brain?
And what would God say about that?
Well here are a few thoughts he might have (has had) on the matter:
Romans 16:19
Everyone has heard about your obedience, so I am full of joy over you; but I want you to be wise about what is good, and innocent about what is evil.
Psalm 101: 2b, 3a
I will walk in my house
with blameless heart.
I will set before my eyes
no vile thing.
Hmmm...
Am I innocent about things that are evil? Or am I so engrossed in a TV drama that I can't wait until the next episode to see what will happen. Earlier in the year Nick and I got sucked in by a particular TV series on DVD. We spent HOURS (approximately 24 of them:) watching season 1 over a few weeks. We talked about the characters when we weren't watching and were TOTALLY into it. And really, the only reason we haven't started the next season is that we have so much going on that we know we will waste too much time on television when it's not something that we feel is valuable to us. We know our personalities enough to know that we can't just watch one episode here and there when we have an extra (ha!) hour, our minds will again become consumed by it, we'll stay up too late... you know the drill. Our decision NOT to watch season 2 had NOTHING to do with the body count of several dozen, the kidnappings, rape, drug abuse, etc. (ie evil) of the first season.
So, no. I am not being "innocent" to evil. I am entertaining myself with it.
Am I setting vile things before my eyes?
Well, obviously I am. (See above paragraph.)
I don't know what all of this means. I really, really don't want to be one of "those Christians." But if I believe the Bible is true (which I do) how do I justify this?
Any thoughts?
